“In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul.” Psalms 94:19.
Why do we think its so great to be busy all the time? Running here, running there, planning for this and that…especially in the church.
Our lives become so cluttered with this stuff and its just STUFF.
I found myself earlier this year just loading myself with plans. Teaching Sunday school, my Singles Life Group, my Women’s Life Group, volunteering at the church, etc. I was going to church every Sunday and putting my all into serving as much as I could. I was immersed and feeling kind of lost at the same time.
But at that moment, I felt further away from Jesus than I ever had before.
It felt like I was doing these things for selfish reasons, for my own gain, and not for Jesus and His Kingdom.
I was still doing my devotionals and listening to my worship music but I felt so empty. My prayer game was weak. I was physically there doing all of these things, but my heart was so far away from the real reason we serve and involve ourselves in these things: Jesus.
I finally spoke up about it one night in my Singles Life Group and said that I was quitting pretty much everything except going to Life Group and church on Sunday because of this. I honestly expected them to give me crap and say that if anything, I should serve more.
But the unexpected happened, and most of them said that they agreed with me and they have been there before too. I was pretty shocked, but at the same time, thankful that this wasn’t just something I was experiencing.
I have de-cluttered my life of the “church junk” until I feel like I am ready to serve happily, for Jesus. I really do not know when that day will come, but I know it will come exactly when it is supposed to.
I’ve come to the realization that it is better to have a relationship with Christ than to just be a face in the church.